Soapy Farts

Since Jeff and I got Shea, my mother has had this idea of giving Shea a bath in her jacuzzi tub. I think she's crazy. I have explained to her numerous times that he isn't exactly a bath-loving dog. He fights and squirms. He usually breaks free, slips and slides across the floor, and shakes himself dry. Plus, he loses enough fur to clog the Hoover Dam when he gets a bath.

After trying to convince my mother for, practically, the past two years, I finally let her have her way. I figured she will not get the idea out of her head until she tries it. And quiet frankly, I'm tired of hearing it! In her head, she must envision the tub filled and Shea will willingly jump in like it is a swimming hole. Then he will sit nicely while he is soaped up and rinsed off. She probably pictures him in a shower cap too! I decided she needs to get over this notion and there is no better way to relieve her of that than letting her experience it.

My mother felt the best way to go about this was to prefill the tub and take everything out of the bathroom. Shea and I went up to the bathroom and I shut the door behind us. He became uneasy as soon as the door closed. This isn't normal, so he had a sense something was up. After letting him roam around and sniff the bathroom, he spotted a  bar of soap near the wall. I have noticed, as of late, that Shea has a thing for soap. He likes the way it tastes. Funny, as I was always punished with soap in the mouth. Anyways, Shea climbed up on the tub and maneuvered his way around the edges of the tub. For some reason, my water dog wanted nothing to do with the water in the jacuzzi tub. And what did he do? He grabbed the soap and swallowed it whole!

When he gingerly made his way back to the floor, I took matters into my own hands. I got him in the tub and got him wet. He jumped out and slide across the tile floor. I soaped up my hands with his doggy shampoo and slathered it all over his body. Then, I filled my hands with water and continued to dump it on him. By this time, he was jumping at the door as if he could get out by doing that. While Shea didn't get a bath per say, I like to think that he got a Mexican Doggy Bath. The results were very similar to a real bath, as he smells good and his coat is clean and shiny.

As for the soap, I immediately researched the effects that this could have. First and foremost, he is not in any danger. I just need to keep my eyes out for some unfortunate side effects. While these maybe unpleasant, they will surely be entertaining. Diarrhea, burping bubbles, and farting bubbles. I am hoping that we can skip over the first and only see the latter two for a short period of time.