Glasses

My mother is old! A few day ago she called me to ask me if I accidentally took her glasses. I didn't.

Each day since she has continued to ask me. She was completely flabbergasted about where her glasses could have went. Knowing my mother, the first place I looked was on her face. They weren't there. Then the top of her head. Weren't there either. So, I too, was at a loss.

She search high and low to no avail. She even picked through the garbage. Then, she came up with the only solution she could think of: blaming Shea. Shea must have eaten her glasses, because he does things like that so often. I leave my glasses on the bedside table every night and he has never eaten my glasses. He's never eaten Jeff's glasses (minus that one pair of sunglasses and one pair of regular glasses, way back when).

The thing is, when she first blamed Shea, I was pretty sure she was joking. However, with her continuing failing searches, I could tell she couldn't get it out of her mind. She kept asking him what he did with her glasses. She suddenly began to resemble an alcoholic who lies to themselves enough that they begin to believe what they are saying.  I could tell when she kept telling me she couldn't find her glasses she was insinuating that my dog had eaten them.

Lo and behold, today, my mother found her glasses. Amazingly, Shea did not eat them. I knew he wouldn't do that kind of thing anymore. She had dropped them while she was outside. Luckily they didn't get run over by the lawn mower. I can't come up with any other conclusion as to how this could have happened than, simply, my mother is old.