Passport

Today I went to get a new passport. What a stinkin' process! Actually, it really isn't when you think about it. You just have to go, get your picture taken, and fill out some paper work. The only thing that actually takes time is getting to passport cleared and mailed.

The passport people have some major rules and regulations for the pictures. I was not aware of this. First, the girl told me I was not allowed to smile. Little did she know how hard that is for me. Next, she made me take my earrings out and my necklace off. Apparently no jewelry is allowed in passport photos. And lastly, she asked me remove my shirt. I'm not joking. I got a little uncomfortable at this point and wasn't sure if she was really qualified to be taking this photo. I somewhat remember being able to smile last time I got a passport. Lucky for me, she was only kidding. She was okay with me having that on. Sick sense of humor that girl had.

From her shirt request and her way of talking to me, I am pretty sure she was hitting on me. Somewhat uncomfortable and nervous, I began to giggle. It is my natural reaction to discomfort. This instinct compounded with the difficulty I have not smiling, especially when a camera is stuck in my face, did not make for a good combination.

After a few takes where I simply broke down laughing, I used the strategy of biting the inside of my mouth. It hurt, but seemed to work a bit better. It only took two more tries once I started doing this. When she showed me the pictures I was devastated by how mean and nasty I looked. I could never imagine myself being this mean.

Scary right? Definitely, as most passport photos seem to be, a mugshot. There is no doubt that if I commit a crime, that is the photo they are sticking on the television screen and in the newspapers. They won't show me as the sweet, smiling person I really am.

Anyways, as I was leaving the girl handed me my receipt. She gave me a sly wink on my way out, somewhat creepy. But hey, that picture of me is pretty darn creepy too!